Letters to my Children · April 2014

I know things have been a little different for you this last month with your transition into your new role of “Big Brother.” I wasn’t sure how you would react to not being the only child anymore or how much you comprehended when you pointed to mommy’s tummy and said “Baby Emma” after I attempted to explain to you about our growing family. You started calling every baby you saw in real life, on TV, the newborns mommy was editing on her computer and every other baby “Baby Emma.” Every morning at breakfast, you picked out the smallest blueberry on your plate and affectionately named it “Baby Emma” as well…so I really didn’t know what to think, ha ha. When you first met your sister in the hospital you were a little timid, but there was a lot going on with all the strange machines and noises and people you didn’t know. However, since then you have shown nothing but overwhelming love towards your new baby sister…if anything, I have been more worried about you “loving” her too much. I think I have used the word “gentle” more in the last few weeks than I have in my whole entire life, ha ha. You even tried to play “catch” with your sister the first day back at home…thankfully mommy was able to intercept the large beach ball heading right towards her, ha ha. Even though I immediately knew I had my work cut out for me for the next few months/years, I was actually happy that you wanted to “play” with your sister right away and so grateful that you instantly accepted her as part of our family. Each morning, you enthusiastically yell “Baby Emma! Baby Emma! Baby Emma!” as you rush into our room to peek into her bassinet to greet your baby sister. It is so sweet to see how concerned you are whenever she cries and how much you love being mommy’s little helper. Even though it’s not the most prestigious of jobs, you love taking her dirty diapers to the trash and it makes me happy to see how proud you are to be a “Big Boy” and help out in whatever way you can. Right before I left for the hospital to have your baby sister, I snuck into your room while you were sound asleep and laid down with you for a few minutes. As I held you in my arms, I started crying, wondering if I really had room in my heart to love another child as much as I love you. I know some days I struggle to keep up with your endless energy, but I really do love you so so much and I am so proud of what an amazing big brother you have become.